Aardy R. DeVarque (aardy) wrote,
Aardy R. DeVarque
aardy

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You're a Good Man, Harry Potter

idonotlikepeas started it with this comment on coffeechica's journal:

(Book report on Harry Potter, Harry Potter, Harry Potter...)

Given the flurry of summaries, reviews, and, well, book reports on my friendslist, and how truly deeply ingrained You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown is on my psyche, I couldn't resist continuing the joke... and then reposting it here (with some tweaking & expansion) for the general public.



LUCY:
"Harry Potter is a stupid book about a stupid wizard who steals horcruxes from Voldemort the Dark Lord. (One, two, three, four, five...)"

SCHROEDER:
"The name of the book about which, this book report is about is, Harry Potter which is about this wizard. I found it very-- I liked the part where-- It was a-- It reminded me of Robin Hood! And the part where Little John jumped from a rock to the Sheriff of Nottingham's back, and then Robin and everyone swung from the trees in a sudden surprise attack [...] And his men rushed in and the arrows flew-- Harry Potter did sort of that kind of thing too."

LINUS:
"In examining a book such as Harry Potter, it is important that the superficial chracteristics of its deceptively simple plot should not be allowed to blind the reader to the more substantial fabric of its deeper motivations. In this report I plan to discuss the sociological implications of family pressures so great as to drive an otherwise moral wizard to perform Unforgivable Curses which he consciously knew were against the law. I also hope to explore the personality of Professor Snape in his conflicting roles as villain and humanitarian."

CHARLIE BROWN:
"If I start reading now, when I'm not really rested, I might skip to the ending, which is not good at all. I'll get a fresh start tomorrow, and read LJ Wednesday, so I'll have all of Tuesday, unless something should happen. Why does this always happen, I should be outside playing, getting fresh air and sunshine. I work best under pressure, and there'll be lots of pressure, if I wait till tomorrow, I should start reading now, but if I start reading now, when I'm not really rested, I could skip to the ending, which is not good at all."



Feudalism: Serf & Turf
Tags: harry potter, humor, musicals
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