September 20th, 2005


How to survive a subpar restaurant

Found this via Television Without Pity's sitcom forum thread for Kitchen Confidential (a show which I loved, by the way), and I tracked it back to the original source.

(Credit where credit is due: From the Today's Worry blog, by "marymom", 5/13/2005)
...when the kids were little and we would travel out west to see the national parks, we developed a mode of eating we called Utah rules. This was not, yay, pump your fist, Utah Rules! but what to do in a dining situation in Utah. Since we had eaten many subpar meals in Utah, we decided that the best way to approach the cuisine was to limit it to the least number of preparation steps; the classic being, kill cow, cook cow, eat cow. This would apply to an unembellished steak. Getting your desired doneness, well, a crap shoot.
I've been in restaurants like that. The restaurant in a (to remain nameless) hotel in Huntsville sticks out in my mind. The service was slow, the food was often already cold and/or tasted awful (how hard is it to mess up scrambled eggs?), but it was apparently the only restaurant within a mile or so of the hotel. Yet despite staying in said hotel for a week, I almost never saw anyone in the restaurant. Then I discovered why: the hotel shuttle was ready, willing, and able to take guests out to a *good* restaurant of their choice (even if that choice was as vague as "something Italian"), and if you called the shuttle desk when you were done, they'd sweep by to pick you up, and the only charge was whatever you tipped the driver. Needless to say, I didn't have dinner in the hotel restaurant after that.

Feudalism: Serf & Turf
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